


Redemption Value - No Deposit, No Return by Tenaya

by tenaya



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Gen, Humor, Parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2002-06-27
Updated: 2002-06-27
Packaged: 2017-10-12 00:14:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,986
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/118708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tenaya/pseuds/tenaya
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>General Hammond saves the SGC from danger and helps recover what was lost.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Redemption Value - No Deposit, No Return by Tenaya

**Author's Note:**

> Written in response to Season Six. Jonas fans should skip this one.

The sound of a single gunshot thundered through the SGC's Gateroom, its raw report scraping like fingernails as it echoed over the bare concrete walls. The men and women who were readying SG–8 for their next mission froze at the explosive sound, their hands reaching for their own weapons as their eyes anxiously sought out the source of the danger.

From where Major Samantha Carter stood at the base of the ramp, she could see through the Briefing Room window, the panicky scramble as the personnel inside fled to safety, away from the door of General Hammond's office.

"Oh, my god! General Hammond!" She reached over to the junior member of SG–8 and seized his side–arm. "Sorry, Captain," she said, flipping off the Beretta's safety. "Find Colonel O'Neill and bring him to the Briefing Room, ASAP."

As the captain ran to a wall phone, Carter held her weapon at the ready and ran resolutely towards the Control Room and the spiral staircase that accessed the offices above.

She had cordoned off the exits and had just finished questioning the team that had vacated the Briefing Room when she heard a clear, strong voice behind her.

"Major Carter, report!" Colonel O'Neill spoke as he strode confidently into the room, his long legs eating up the distance quickly. The Beretta he held was pointed towards the floor.

"One gun shot, sir; a handgun by the sound of it. General Hammond had just left a briefing with SG–14 to take a phone call in his office."

O'Neill shot her a sharp, questioning stare.

"No one else was known to be in there with him, sir," she said, just as Teal'c ran into the room with a zat.

O'Neill nodded once. "Right. Follow me," he ordered.

Cautiously, the trio approached the door to Hammond's office. O'Neill plastered himself to one side and motioned Carter to the other. Teal'c stood a few feet back, prepared to rush the door head–on, if necessary. When they were set, O'Neill rapped the door three times with his knuckles. "General?"

"Come on in, Colonel. I've secured the room."

At O'Neill's quizzical expression, Carter shrugged, unable to explain the unexpected wording. Slowly, O'Neill opened the door and peered inside. General Hammond was perched on the edge of his desk, a pistol in his hand. Instead of looking over at O'Neill, Hammond was concentrating on an area of the floor behind his desk.

O'Neill, his weapon to the fore, approached warily. "What the—?! General?" he asked as he spied a body on the floor.

"Turn him over, but stay out of my line of fire."

O'Neill moved to one side of the body, reached over its shoulder and rolled Jonas Quinn onto his back. There was a bullet hole between his eyes. O'Neill knelt on one knee and raised an eyebrow. "Impressive. What happened?"

"It was a foothold situation, Colonel. I'd been suspicious of Quinn for the last couple of days. I started to follow him around the base when I noticed our own people were acting differently when he was around."

Intrigued, Carter stepped forward. "How so?"

"Take yourself for example. I've known you since you were a little girl and I've never known you to just give up on a problem."

Surprised to be used as an example, Carter opened her mouth to speak, shut it, then tried again. "I…." she stopped, obviously perplexed.

"Did you come up with any of the possible solutions to our recent crisis, or did you simply refine other people's ideas?" he asked, gently.

Carter flushed. "Just refined them, sir," she admitted. "I don't know what happened, General. I have no excuse for my poor performance."

"And the reason you didn't think to remove the Stargate from the SGC, especially when you've previously removed the gate to rescue yourselves from the Replicator attack on Thor's ship?"

"I…I can't explain it, sir."

"And you, Teal'c, I've never seen you physically beaten by any one man before, yet I saw Jonas Quinn knock you down with one punch. Quinn himself admitted that he'd never boxed or trained in any martial arts before, yet you've trained all your life. How do you explain that?"

Teal'c stared with growing alarm at the body that lay on the floor. "What manner of trickery is this?" he whispered.

O'Neill warily stepped back from Jonas Quinn and the unknown threat he represented.

"It wasn't until I walked into my office and found Quinn reading my reports and going through my desk that I realized his plan involved taking over the entire base. I took out my revolver and shot him before he could affect my behavior, too. He was too dangerous to take alive."

"What sort of being was he, General?"

"Using Dr. Jackson's password to get into the research he had stored on the base's mainframe, I went through the records of the different beings that our allies had come across. According to Dr. Jackson's notes of his conversation with the being known as Lt. Tyler, this creature is called a Mharreesioux. It, for want of a better word, channels the consciousness, skills, knowledge and power of another being unseen by us."

"Super powers, sir? Smarter than Major Carter, stronger than Teal'c?"

"Too right, Colonel."

O'Neill gestured at the body. "That's why you're worried this could reanimate?"

"It's a very real risk. Teal'c, would you be so kind?"

Teal'c stepped forward. "I would be honored, General Hammond." Before anyone could say another word, Teal'c fired his zat three times into Quinn's body. "I have heard of these beings before. Rest assured, no creature, not even a Mharreesioux, can recover from disintegration by zat'nik'tel."

Hammond looked relieved. "I pray you're right, Teal'c."

"Well, I guess we're done here?" O'Neill asked, as he turned to go.

"Actually, Colonel, I'd like to ask you all if you could stay here for a few minutes more."

"Of course, General," O'Neill agreed; after all the man had single–handedly saved them. After a minute of waiting though, he cautiously ventured, "What exactly would you like us to do?"

Hammond glanced expectantly at the door. "Just wait, that's all."

Fifteen minutes passed before Carter grew restless. "Sir? What are we waiting for?"

"Maybe if we move to the Briefing Room," Hammond said, standing up and walking purposefully through the door.

The others exchanged worried glances, but followed him nonetheless.

"Sir?" Carter repeated after another few minutes had ticked by and Hammond had done nothing but stare down at the Stargate. "What are you expecting to happen?"

Hammond's shoulders slumped defeatedly. "I guess it was just a pipe dream. Have you ever heard the saying, 'Nature abhors a vacuum?' I thought that maybe with Quinn gone, maybe *Mother* Nature—"

"That Oma Desala might bring back Daniel! Sir, that's a brilliant plan!"

Hammond smiled sadly. "It would've been, if it'd worked. Since it hasn't, you're free to resume your duties." He turned slowly back towards his office.

"General Hammond! Wait!" Teal'c's deep voice boomed excitedly across the room. Everyone turned and at Teal'c's urging, ran towards the window. There below, the Stargate shimmered with its unearthly blue light and in front of it undulated a white, luminous radiance with vaguely fish like movements. The ethereal being floated up until it was even with the window, then it simply swam through it and into the room. Tendrils of light flattened themselves against the main body as it elongated. Suddenly, Oma Desala stood in front of them, her aristocratic features serene and all–knowing.

General Hammond stepped forward. "Ms. Oma Desala, I presume?"

She dipped her head in regal acknowledgment.

"We are very pleased that you could, eh, drop by," he said, using a nod to include O'Neill, Carter and Teal'c in the sentiment.

Oma waited patiently.

O'Neill moved closer. "It's like this, Oma, things haven't been the same since Daniel left. Everyone's grumpy, we're basically scraping by on luck, and well, everything is just…off."

"The fizz is gone if the soda no longer foams when agitated," Oma announced.

O'Neill was shocked. "I understood that! Did you guys understand that?" Without waiting for his friends to answer, O'Neill pressed on. "Yes! Daniel is the fizz of the SGC and we miss him very much. Is there any chance we could have him back? We need him."

"There's no one around who can do the things that he does, or knows the things he knows. Please, Oma," Sam begged earnestly.

Oma glanced towards Hammond's office. "If the house is warm and well–lit, then the match was struck for another reason."

Brows were furrowed and the room grew quiet as they thought hard to decipher Oma's words.

O'Neill cautiously sniffed the air. "Teal'c, did you…?"

"No," Teal'c said, mild offense radiating off him as he stared into the distance.

"Oh!" Carter exclaimed. "I think she means the Mharreesioux!"

Hammond gave Oma a sharp, discerning stare. "You're right, Miss; Jonas Quinn is no more. We discovered his deception, neutralized him and now are completely free of his influence. I can tell you right now we never would have allowed Dr. Jackson to leave without first exhausting every last resource available to assist him. If it's at all possible, we would like to have Dr. Jackson come back to us. Descended, of course."

Oma smiled and flowers bloomed all over the world whether it was Spring or Fall, day or night, and everyone in the SGC felt the ice that had been wrapped around their hearts melt. They were finally at peace for the first time in three months. Rebirth, renewal, and the very essence of life vibrated through them, and they held their breaths in anticipation.

Then Oma Desala spoke, her voice clear and strong. "The butterfly travels across the world, yet it returns to the stream that gave it birth." She turned towards the window and stretched her arms out. "Behold the butterfly!"

Greatly confused by the inaccurate imagery, but nonetheless hopeful, Hammond and SG–1 turned as directed and waited.

The Stargate flared to life and a second luminous being swam through the blue ripples. It paused, its tentacles waving gently back and forth in a manner distinctly reminiscent of a swimmer treading water. Suddenly, it surged forward, gave a small bounce and soared up through the window and into the room where it hovered excitedly.

"Daniel?" O'Neill asked uncertainly.

The tentacles waggled faster.

Oma held out her hands and the being moved forward quickly, its glowing prehensile limbs entwining up her arms. She closed her eyes, her expression one of pure bliss. Her chest heaved and her breathing deepened. After a minute or two she moaned and the glow began to brighten and solidify — and Daniel appeared. His skin was flushed and his hair mussed. Eyes dilated, his gaze swept the room, lingering on each of his friends. "Hey guys…." he breathed. "I've missed you so much!" His eyes were shinning with unshed tears.

"Oh, my god, Daniel!"

"Daniel Jackson."

"Welcome home, son!"

"Danny…."

Instantly he was surrounded and hugged from all sides. Hands reached in to ruffle his hair and thump his back.

Suddenly, Jack stilled and gripped Daniel's upper arm. "Wait, you are staying, aren't you?"

Daniel nodded happily. "Yes, Oma says I can get more done here than on the astral plane."

Oma primly folded her hands together. "The road to Nirvana is unattainable if one keeps stopping off in Paradise," she said, giving Daniel a look of such primal hunger that the room took on a fuzzy glow.

The room's occupants exchanged suspicious expressions.

"Yeah, I know," Daniel dismissed with a shrug. "I haven't been able to figure out most of her sayings. In fact, she's been very distracted lately, but boy, can she do this merging thing that's, well, kinda like sex, though they don't have sex, but it's really…WOW…better than sex. Oma says it's important to merge at least eight times a day, because it's vital that we maintain our spirituality," Daniel chatted happily, vibrating with excess energy.

As one, everyone turned towards Oma, their expressions ranging from deeply scandalized to hostile.

Oma scuffled her feet and nervously cleared her throat, the sound loud in the awkward silence. "I think I'd better go now. Catch you later, Daniel — in about forty years," she said, giving him a wink and smile before she dissolved into a glowing state. She glided over and hovered in front of him, her tentacles caressing his face, arms, and shoulders. He jumped slightly as one luminous limb stole around and cupped his butt, giving it a firm squeeze.

"Hey, hey!" O'Neill said, waving his hands about as though he was trying to fan away smoke as he strode towards Oma.

The ascended being darted away from Daniel and O'Neill, and quickly glided out of the room. From the briefing room window, they could see an event horizon form within the Stargate. Oma sailed through with stately grace, one elongated fin cheerily waving goodbye.

Daniel rubbed his behind. "Oma's a very touchy–feely person, ah, entity," he explained.

"So it would appear," said Teal'c.

There was a pause, then Carter observed dryly, "Can you call an ascended being a 'dirty ol' letch?"

Daniel frowned. "That seems a little harsh. She's just…friendly."

"That's one way of putting it." General Hammond did not look convinced.

"Apparently, you can be both enlightened and clueless, sir," O'Neill told Hammond crisply before he turned quickly to Daniel and put his arm around his shoulders. "So, Daniel, do you want your old job back? Same office, same pay…an SG–1 badge on your BDUs?"

Daniel's face lit with a glow that had nothing to do with ascension. "Yeah, Jack. I'd like that very much."

O'Neill glanced at Hammond. "General?"

"Consider it done, Colonel." He bestowed a fatherly smile at Daniel. "I'm glad you're home safe and sound, Dr. Jackson. You were sorely missed."

Daniel beamed with pleasure at the kind words. "Thank you, General."

O'Neill squeezed Daniel's shoulders. "Let's get you back in your office."

"My office! Jack, do you know how Jonas was treating my stuff? There are smudges of peanut butter on the pages of my journals. He spit grape seeds behind my file cabinets. He put my books back on the shelves out of order!"

Jack cocked his head to one side. "How can you know that?"

Daniel became even more distressed. "I have been back a few times to visit, you know. I didn't just…leave," he said, offended. "I worried about you. I wanted to be there for you if you needed me. So, on one of my visits I stopped by my office and saw him…there…at my desk with food and banana peels in the sink," he said, his hands fluttering about in agitation.

"We'll fix it, Daniel," Jack soothed. "We'll get some airmen in there to fumigate the place if you think that'll help."

Daniel turned to face Jack square on, his eyes solemn and huge. "He played with my artifacts, Jack. He treated my books, my possessions and my profession in a flippant manner. He even put wet tea bags in my wedding bowl. That hurt."

O'Neill stared deep into those sad, blue eyes and was filled with shame and regret for not standing up for Daniel's things, and by default, Daniel. "I'm sorry, Daniel. I know now I shoulda bounced his butt back through the Stargate right after he got here. I just…had other things on my mind at the time. I didn't know he was treating your stuff like that."

Daniel nodded, accepting the apology. "But he's gone now, right?"

"Three shots with a zat. Ain't nobody — no matter whose Mharreesioux he is — gonna bring him back from that."

"I can't say I'm sorry. Peanut butter, Jack. On my personal journals."

Jack paused thoughtfully, then picked up a black and silver travel mug off Hammond's desk. "We could go to the firing range and use his mug for target practice?"

Daniel took the mug from Jack, indecision warring on his face. Finally, he sighed. "No. That's kinda juvenile and wouldn't solve anything. Besides, it would just…make a mess," he added unhappily.

Jack smiled, and for the first time in months, true warmth lit his face until his eyes sparkled with happiness. "I have SO missed you! Come here," he said, enveloping Daniel in a massive bear hug that pulled the younger man off his feet.

Teal'c, Sam, and Hammond moved in to give hugs of their own. Voices thick with emotion echoed the welcoming sentiment and Daniel bloomed with joy at the unrestrained affection.

A few minutes later, the initial avalanche of emotion was past and eyes were dried, noses blown, and Daniel had been touched enough to reassure his friends that he truly was back amongst the descended. He started to set the coffee mug back down on Hammond's desk, then paused. "Maybe I'll hang on to this after all."

"Why?" Jack asked curiously.

"Because I think on our next mission, I'd like to toss this into the backwash of a forming wormhole," he said with a small smile. "There'd be no mess to clean up that way."

"I guess you've changed your mind about being mature?" Jack chuckled.

"Maybe the Nox and Tollan were right after all," Daniel said, slightly abashed, but stubbornly holding on to the travel mug.

"Hey! I'd rather you be 'very young' and on SG–1, than old and wise, and mothballed with that cradle–robbing, dayglow sexpot."

"Jack!"

"Daniel?"

"Oma's a very advanced person. I can't begin to tell you about all the incredible stuff I learned from her—"

"I bet."

"—or the amazing civilizations and places I've seen."

Jack patted Daniel's back fondly. "But something tells me you're going to give it a good try," he said dryly.

END


End file.
